Soulfuldiaries

                                          WHY I STAY? these walls don't feel home they are void as a sarcophagus. the foundations I could rely upon are faulty. I could not breathe I am perishing The roots exclaimed. The petals and leaves Drooling Breathing in all the dry cold air The tress Moult and die The water Sits still and stagnant this Doesn't feel home? Silence feels deeper and deeper The echoes in the hallway Wander away The scent of baked cookies Lost the scent of their trail. All is left Are shadows With fear at each corner so please tell me why I stay?                                                                                 ...

                                               BACK TO HOME As I wake up I see through the curtains Warmth In the sky The chill In the breeze Joy sputtering in the air It was good to be home. I lie on Mom's lap The warmth and radiance Invading the chaotic soul We see The white fluffy clouds punctuating the blue-sky Sun peeping through the woollen blanket The frost coating on the grass Melting and falling On the green sheet The tree of gods Standing tall and solitary Stretching its arms. We could hear the grass whispering Lilies, daffodils,lady-like tulips blossoming The sucking of nectar Butterflies dancing in the wind Wait Can you hear the vibrations? My mother startled It was The buzzing of bees The rustling of the leaves The Pine's Citrusy odour Meddling with me. I wish I could Freeze these memories as the darkness began...

                                           ANXIETY "A battlefield No traces of bows and arrows, No cannons, An illusionary vision, Colourblind to every colour, Fidgeting, fiddling, Calmness in turbulence." Anxiety is an uncertain and diffused concern which we come across because of fear or apprehension. I often hear words like anxiety, depression and mood swings daily by people. Are we aware and know the repercussions of these situations. I am afraid we don't.  Mental disorders are equivalent to entering a battlefield without weapons. Most people express fear of snakes, heights, thunderstorms, lightning, moths, spiders, dark rooms. I often fear lizards, cockroaches and rats. My heart starts pacing and fear resides in my body and mind. If anxiety and fear become excessive, they cause intense and emotional distress in everyday life, they integrate phobias....

CAGED Society full of animation Threw me again now, I am just the blood that stains my pillowcases (apology) what pleasant delights will grace this presence? dried, desiccated heart coated with frostiness and chill in November. abandoned I will remain under the withered skin. just like the keratin debris present under the fingernails. my feet and hands numb As muscle dysfunction begins to function my pounding, spongy brain still trying to perceive the day's madness. sputtering psychosis scrubbing my neurotic soul all's that left is silence unnoticed In the echoes Of the vibrations Sent by the world. all that's alive is the base camp quiet with paracetamol lingering.                                                                                 ...

                 THE DEATH OF HUMANKIND: PART ONE   Human beings are social creatures. We reciprocate to signals of love and affection.  Perhaps, humanity has lost its way. The dehumanisation of man continues with every passing era. Cynical, isn't it?  The reckless ways that man has used to kill other human beings for his selfish desires begin from ancient times. The selfish and cynical behaviour of humans started from ancient times to the beginning of the twentieth century.  The crucifixion of Jesus Christ was the first act of dehumanisation. In ancient Roman times, the capital punishment given to the slaves and criminals was crucifixion.  He was stripped of his clothes and led to  Golgotha . He was offered a mixture of vinegar, gall and myrrh. The nails used as a useful tool becomes a securing weapon to cause pain and suffering. Perhaps, as time passed new techniques and methods start...

I WISH   My heart does not flutter often. It's rare.  I wonder why I love to live in a fictional world rather than a real world. No boundaries defined and feel boundless from all the daily chores of life.  It's like diving in deep water without the fear of drowning.  The air is fresh while I can breathe without holding onto the breath.  A free soul unfolding the deep dark secrets hid in the heart's closet.  The silence in my mind approaches an end.  Imagination reaches beyond perception and human senses.  Imagination blends with art and science.  The scars on my skin get to breathe the air where the pain is inevitable.  The faint traces of my blood clots still swim in my bloodstream. Alas, "In the real world I am knee-deep in my thoughts and my actions".  I am drowning and limping for exhaustion.  The grooves and ridges of my mind are suffocating.  I am in my clutches again designed and ...

THE MAZE I am in a maze  With all vague thoughts in my mind Pretending to find my way out  Out of a labyrinth I unquestionably walked in Hoping there will be an exit too Stuck and lost  But I don't know the exit Which way is safer anymore  I wipe off the map  End up obliterating every chance at absconding, Escaping the light, happiness Condemning every relationship Alas, end up blaming the vagabondage  Because of a lack of direction in my journey.                                                                                                                             @soulfulwriter

DAYS OF PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS Remember when we were in our days of childhood ? Laughing, playing, living as if there is no end to our happiness. I miss my childhood, miss the way I took pleasure even when greater things crumbled.  I could not control the circumstances and how to dwell with them.  I could not run from the world I was living in but took joy in things that made me happy. As time passes by, we start living in a world full of critics and quirks. Childhood is living in a fairy tale, playing in the sun; not living a nightmare. This fairy tale we live in soon becomes a nightmare. Everything becomes apocalyptic. It gives us an insight into what we want in our lives and what we aspire to do.  It gives us the worst scars and exhilarating moments. It's a fascinating place.  Old enough to feel truly adult, old enough to make decisions that affect the rest of our lives, old enough to take responsibilities, old enough to fall in love and hea...